The Unity Guy™ Blog

Courage is bravery in the face of fear.  Such wording is part of its description according to The Virtues Project™.  While this is not necessarily revolutionary in thought, I believe it does bear repeating, and pondering.

Courage is the bravery in the face of fear.  It is staring fear in the face.  It is not the absence of fear.  It is its acknowledgement, acceptance and steely eyed resolve to deal with it; even use it, if you will…  as motivation and inspiration.  The dance that defines our life is the partnership of courage and fear… where our courage takes the lead and our fear inspires us.

Fear comes in many forms.  Some fear is based on cold hard reality.  Some things can kill you.  Other fears are purely between the ears, residing in our mind.

I remember a recent conversation with my good friend Jeremy Bennett (www.jeremybennett.ca), one of the 5 faces of mental health for a recent federal campaign around understanding mental wellness.   He wrote the book How I Beat OCD.  He also speaks to this topic and the power of the mind, including an event in St. John’s in March (check it out).  Anyway, I digress.  I do remember that conversation and saying that I find it odd that we talk about mental health as if it is a relatively small component of our society that deals with challenges to our metal wellness.  I remember suggesting that the vast majority of us have some fear not truly based in reality; and that we all have some measure or degree of question around our mental wellness… and that, because of that, there should be no stigma on mental health.

I have heard it said that 98% of the general population have a fear of public speaking.  Forget the fact that I do not believe in public speaking because I have never met a public.     This is a common fear in all ages.  Some surveys have indicated it is ranked higher than death!  So, we say we would rather die than speak to a group of people!  Will such speaking kills us?  Clearly, it will not.  Yet, after years of training speakers, both amateur and professional, I can tell you that that fear is real, but no based on reality.

If not public speaking, then many of us have some other somewhat irrational fear of either being rejected or walking into  a room full of strangers or the dark, or spiders or mice or… well, you get the picture.  I am not minimizing these.  I have shared in them and still do to an ever decreasing extent.

I am not even suggesting that we must rid ourselves of all fears.  I have no desire to rid myself of the fear of parachuting.  It is not on my bucket list.  Maybe sometime in the future it will be.  Still, there are fears that hold us back from doing things we deeply want to do… from meeting someone to trying something we have always dreamed of doing.  As an audacious but shy child, I rarely drew attention to myself in class, but inside, I so wanted to be “out there”, engaged and involved.

So, for now, and in the spirit of brevity, I suggest this week on my Facebook and Twitter pages, I will be exploring courage… the courage we need to live our best lives.  I do hope you will join me.

Peace and prosperity, through courage…

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

PS

February 20, 2012 marks my 52^nd birthday, and I choose to face my remaining 73 years (my wondrous wife Christina and I have agreed that 125 is my minimum stay in this realm, and youthful aging predictions for boomers and beyond are in my favour) with courage to live as my spirit truly moves me, and not as the fear between the ears might try to prevent me.  So far, and in preparation, I have joined one band and started another (a Meatloaf Tribute Rock Band called Dashboard Lights)… both teenage dreams… a 52 year young freakin’ rocker, I am!  Bring it!!! 

PPS

One of the bands is putting off an inspirationl night of music and message on Saturday, March 3, 2012.  Check it out at http://intuneinspirations.com/events/

Consideration is being thoughtful of other people and their feelings.

I might suggest that consideration has gotten either a bad rap or certainly a misguided one over the years. Far too often, I run across attitudes that it is somehow “soft” or “inefficient”.  Other times, I sense it is used almost synonymously with being “nice”.

Consideration is being thoughtful. You consider your actions and their effects. That seems to me to be the foundation of wisdom. Rather than going in guns a blazing, you give thought to your actions, and you ponder and wrap your head around the thoughts and opinions of others. Leadership in the 21st century needs to be entrepreneurial and adventurous indeed.  It needs to be bold and creative certainly. Still, it absolutely requires consideration. The impact that we have now, whether through words or weapons, is so powerful that consideration is vital.

To those who believe that we are beings of conflict by nature, let me propose that there is a difference between conflict of ideas and conflict of persons. The conflict and clash of ideas, if supported by heaping doses of consideration, can produce truly imaginative and out of the box approaches. The conflict of persons, a result of a lack of consideration, produces dysfunction and war on small or very large levels.

Consideration can be used to channel bullying into bold leadership.  The assertive qualities of the one bullying can be put to much more constructive use, once consideration is added to the mix.  Assertiveness without compassion and consideration is bullying.  Assertiveness with consideration proves to be a positive take charge and wise mentality.  This goes for bullying in schools, workplaces, parliaments, sports and international relations.  We need to encourage the assertiveness but balance it with consideration.

This applies to our seemingly institutionalized arenas of conflict between employers and labour, opposition and government, and more.  With consideration, I contend that we start to come together and create solutions that work for us all.  We welcome the clash of ideas, with consideration and openness.  There, creativity gets its most amazing life.

Consider this. Consideration is the filter we use to get to our best solutions. It takes into account the many perspectives and produces results both wise and effective.

Peace.

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

Consider these….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mOWdoX8BM1g

Have a considerate day. 

Confidence, a quick thought.

Check out Wikipedia and confidence at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confidence.

It notes confidence as trust and faith and draws reference to its difference from arrogance.

Here’s the thought…

Confidence is knowing what you do well and what you don’t do well, and being comfortable in seeking the help of others in what they do well.

When we do this, confidence best serves us, and we best serve the world at work, play, community and home.

Just thought to share.  Go confidently. 

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

We are humble enough to practice; confident enough to win.

Credited to Tom Coughlin, Head Coach, New York (Football) Giants

The Virtues Project™ Educators’ Card speaks of confidence with the following words…

Confidence is having faith in someone.  Self-confidence is trusting you have what it takes to handle whatever happens.  You feel sure of yourself and enjoy trying new things, without letting doubts or fears hold you back. When you have confidence in others, you rely on them.

I like this, but I also like to take it a little deeper.  I contend that the question is not whether we have confidence, but in what do we have confidence?

Self confidence is about having the confidence in our own capacities to deal with whatever comes our way.  It truly has to do with the spirit that, in triumph or trial, we have the ability to not only survive but, one day, thrive through the lessons learned.

Still, I put forward the idea that the deeper, cooler, stronger confidence comes from an understanding that the universe “works”; and that we need to be true to ourselves, authentic, and keep walking… fully understanding that, as we walk confidently, we are trusting that what we need will come from both inside and outside of us.

I do not believe in luck.  I do believe that preparation and opportunity wins results.  I suggest that our own personal confidence is bound in practice and continuing to walk the walk, the authentic and purposeful walk… that implies a trust that all will be provided.  The greatest confidence is a meeting place between what we know we can do, and what Providence or God or the Universe will do in response.

THAT I contend is the Law of Attraction, the Secret, and the Power of Positive Thinking.

THAT is confidence of the highest order.

One of the Central Figures in the Baha’i Faith, `Abdu’l-Bahá, once said “As ye have faith, so shall your powers and blessings be…”.  This ancient truth was spoken of in all Sacred Scriptures.  It speaks to the notion that, if we are true to ourselves and are moving in the best of directions with confidence in ourselves, we can ultimately be confident in the provisions that come to us, however we believe the vehicle to work.  So, I am suggesting that the question is not do we have confidence, but in what do we have confidence?

I have confidence in the power of purpose, and idealism… love, honor and zeal.  I have confidence that, if my purpose is true, and I walk with honor and zeal and idealism and love… then I will walk towards my destination.  This impacts me in a myriad of ways.  My students know I do not believe in retirement.  I believe in finding work that rocks and loving it.  I do not believe in counting the days.  I do not believe in stopping working.  I do believe in stopping working at something in which I do not believe.  I will write more to this in a future blog.  For now, suffice it to say, I suggest that my confidence is placed in my ability to increasingly be true to the work I really want to do and to keep walking that path.  That work is found in my business, my teaching, my family and community life, my play, and more.

So, for you, in what do you have a deeper confidence?  What is the coolest path, in which you believe?  We have talked of assertiveness, caring, cleanliness, commitment and compassion.  Bearing these in mind and heart, what is your path, the one you honestly hold to… what is that path?  How can you build that wondrous balance of confidence in yourself and Creation and the team that you are?

Here are my suggestions…

• Read the Sacred Scriptures around faith and confidence, with a fresh eye
• Investigate new opportunities to which you are attracted and explore your courage
• Take a Dale Carnegie Course®
• Meditate and reflect deeply
• Look at your earliest years and see what your original passions and capacities were
• Walk like you mean it
• Connect with those who believe
• Focus on how you make the world better, and can in the future

These are but a few places to start.  I suggest you start; or continue… wherever you are on the journey.  This world is increasingly crying out for confident leaders in all corners of the world; leaders that have reflected on their capacities and found purpose and are working to bring their talents to a better world.

Confidence.  It is the first thing to practice.

Peace.

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

Compassion is understanding and caring when someone is hurt or troubled, even if you don’t know them.

This is the opening line from the Virtues Educator Card compliments of The Virtues Project™.

In March, TEDx is coming to St. John’s and I am making application to speak.  Whether I get the opportunity or not, is not near as important as the theme around Global Citizenship.  Ponder this notion… global citizenship.  One of the few sentences that I truly hang my hat, and heart, on is “the earth is but one country and mankind its citizens”.  At my core and ever since I can remember, I have held strong and fiercely to the notion that this is one planet and THIS is my home.  Beyond something of a concept, the reality is that this requires compassion, a level of caring for those we know and do not know alike.  Global citizenship requires compassion.  Our future as a people, requires it.

Compassion is a power and not a weakness.

Compassion is not about being soft, but strong. It requires vision and confidence, and a level of caring that is palpable.

So, this week, on my Facebook and Twitter pages at Barry Lewis Green, I will be exploring compassion as a strength of leadership.  We have looked at assertiveness and its power to find and focus our voice, to caring as a way to bring our passion to our work and life, to cleanliness as a way to stay on path without distraction, and to commitment as a force to getting “it” done.

This weekend, I shoot a 3 minute video as part of my application to speak at TEDx.  My hope and prayer and intention is to have 15 minutes to talk about a powerful idea around compassion, love and capacity as steps to global citizenship.  Whether it happens or not, the opportunity to remind myself of the power of compassion is remarkable.

So, now, we take on compassion.  My hope is that what we examine will help each of us “take on” compassion, as a cape on our path to leadership.   Compassion is core to extraordinary leadership.  Take it on.

Stay tuned.

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

As a follow up to my post earlier today, I thought it timely and appropriate to put myself on the line.  I was psyching myself up for Championship Sunday in the NFL (0ne earthly version and vision of Heaven).  One of the teams for whom I am rooting is the Baltimore Ravens and one of the reasons for that is Ray Lewis.  This is a player that plays with a singular passion and a love for the honor of the game.  I found a remix on You Tube set to moments with Ray Lewis (see below) and he was saying “What time is it?” with his “brothers in arms” shouting back “Game time!”  It got me thinking that, at this time in January of 2012, it is game time.

Remembering and realizing that “commitment is doing the thing you said you’d do when you felt committed, long after you no longer feel committed”, here are my contemplated commitments for 2012, in brief.

• Commitment #1. Deepen myself in my hard earned faith, through prayer, reading, thoughts and deeds.
• Commitment #2.  Realize my optimal weight and health for quality and quantity of life.
• Commitment #3.  Strengthen two wondrous and loving homes in Newfoundland and New York with my “C”.
• Commitment #4.  Build a family business that is a service to the world, locally and globally.
• Commitment #5.  Build our “armies” and “Camelots” of like minded and hearted souls wanting to serve and rock the world.
• Commitment #6.  Sing and play with others who want to bring joy through soulful, meaningful music, rocking it out.
• Commitment#7.  Teach dance again, as a way to foster unity and chemistry, joy and health.
• Commitment #8.  Return to my love of cartooning and create a “cartoonumn” for thought and smiles.
• Commitment #9.  Write to live and live to write.
• Commitment #10.  Live a life of love and zeal, engaging youth and the young at heart, ever increasingly to reach Idealism 2.0!
• Commitment #11.  Holding a promised “Mayan Picnic” on December 23, 2012 to celebrate whatever transformation is to come. 
• Commitment #12.  Hear the still, small voice inside, detaching me from distractions attempting to knock me off course.

These are but 12, but they are my Rocking 12 in ’12.  As I thought on them, I could feel my pulse.  I could feel that it was my game time, my Game Day.  Now, they are out there and I am glad.  Now, I must realize the sense of commitment expressed earlier; and, in times of challenge, hang on to it.

How about you?

How will you commit to changing the world and your corner of it this year?

Be real, get real, stay real.

Peace.

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

And here’s a message from Ray Ray. 

..

The Educators’ Deck of Virtues Cards (https://virtuesshop.com) has some 52 virtues contained therein. After assertiveness, there are no less than 10 virtues beginning with the letter “C”. Quite the contribution, indeed. That being said, we have covered three virtues so far in 2012 and I think it important to quickly review. We have addressed the importance of assertiveness in finding our true and best voice, the importance of caring as a way to find our best path, and the importance of cleanliness in clearing the way in mind, body and spirit to be our best.

Now, we speak to commitment.

Over the week, and on my Twitter and Facebook pages at Barry Lewis Green, I will be offering thoughts and musings on commitment.  Still, here, I wish to do one simple thing and that is offer you a quote I heard so many years ago. I do not even know its author.  Yet, I love it. My only request is that you ponder it and ask yourself one question after doing so.

First, the quote: Commitment is doing the thing you said you’d do when you felt committed, long after you no longer feel committed. Ponder this. And the question? To what do you need to commit at this time in your life? As we proceed through the week, with the thoughts, ideas, musings and challenges, focus on what is so important to you that you need to commit; truly commit.

Have a committed week and beyond.

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

Week Three on the Virtues Train for 2012.

Cleanliness.  This virtue often gets an oversimplified rap, deeming it specifically about personal hygiene and/or the upkeep of our property.  Still, it is so much more.  As 2012, unfolds, I have a question.  Where do you need to make a fresh start?

We will be exploring various facets of the virtue of cleanliness on my Facebook and Twitter posts, but for here, we concentrate on the following excerpt from the Virtues Educators’ Card from The Virtues Project™.

CLEANLINESS is “… cleaning up mistakes and making a fresh start.”

Where and how does that apply to you, personally and/or professionally?  Are there matters lingering with relationships at home, at work, or in the community?  Are there miscues that need addressing?  Are there dramas or misunderstandings in need of clearing up to best advance moving forward?  What needs to be cleaned up?  In what area of life do you need less physical or psychological clutter?  Where do you need to clean things up to see the path forward?

Cleanliness has many faces and we will explore them this week.  For today, and to keep this blog post “clean”, I leave you with five powerful questions for this week, moving forward.

• In what area of my life do I need to do some cleaning?
• What needs to be cleaned up?
• How will I do that?
• What will it mean when it is cleaned up?
• What is my first action to start this “cleaning ball” rolling?

I once heard that it is easier to clean up than catch up.  Cleaning and the clarity from it can make our path forward so much more tread friendly.

Keep it clean folks.

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™

Of course you do. 

A short but important post this week, me thinks.  This morning, I started the second week of a 52 week project examining 52 virtues noted from The Virtues Project™.  Here is what I wrote on my status at Barry Lewis Green:

CARING as referred to on the virtues card from the Virtues Project states it is about “… giving love and attention to people and things that matter to you.” It can apply to friends and strangers alike; to animals, plants, material objects and more. Sometimes, maybe often times, we forget it can apply to ourselves to take care of ourselves so that we have something to continue to offer to others. This week, we examine the virtue of caring. Hope you enjoy.

Those who care so much often care so little of their own welfare at times.  Often, they will receive advice around taking time and care for themselves “for a change” and it can sound like “instead” of caring for others for a change.  This is difficult.

I suggest it is not either/or… it is “and”.  In order to take best care of others, we must take care of ourselves.  By taking care of ourselves, we actually enable our own power to take care of others.  On a plane, we are expected to apply our own oxygen mask first so that we can then take care of others.  This may seem so clear and obvious; and yet, for many, it is not the path of our care.

I posed the question on Facebook last night… “Do you care?”  The responses were interesting indeed; but one was quite powerful.  The response was simply “about?”

Caring is something we all have as a virtue, but like any virtue, a big question is where we direct it.  That often defines who we are.  Asking ourselves “for what do I care?” and “Why?” are two wonderful questions in determining our passion, and even questioning it.

So, as this week unfolds, I invite you to join me on Facebook and explore caring.  I invite you to care for yourself as you care for others.  I invite you to ask those two powerful questions.

As for me, I strained a recurring back muscle tear from years ago and it is my body’s way of saying time to take care of myself physically.  Over the next few months, I will be caring physically in terms of eating and exercise, sleep and relaxation.  As Stephen Covey might put it… sometimes we are too busy to stop for gas.  I am stopping for gas and more.  It is about the caring.

Take care. 

Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy™